Commander of the army of the Lord

Joshua 5:14 “…No, but as Commander of the army of the Lord I have now come.” *(NKJV)

This was in response to Joshua’s question in verse 13. He wanted to know if the man before him was “for us or for our adversaries.”

All I have shared in the previous blogs have been borne out of painful, devastating experiences. Had it not been for the mercy of the Lord, I would have been totally consumed.  Like the children of Israel, God had taken me out of Egypt pretty summarily. It was no protracted event, then came the taking of Egypt out of me part. I believe that process is still ongoing.

When we make requests of the Lord, let us remember that His ways are not ours, neither are His thoughts. You see, I asked the Lord to deliver me from a situation I had entered into very willfully and deliberately.  He got me out very smoothly and I was getting ready to breathe a sigh of relief when the pains began. Pain like I had not known was possible. I found myself in such straitened circumstances that I began to have anxiety attacks! Many a day, I was certain that I was having a nightmare and waited to wake up, but then night time came and I would realize that I wasn’t dreaming.

Please take a ride with me for a moment and imagine my confusion. I had cried to God for forgiveness and deliverance from an untenable situation and He swiftly came to my aid! He had brought me out of Egypt and even taken me over the Red Sea, I remember thinking, “this is cool! No sooner than I call for help He comes and delivers me.” I immediately started my own business and was making money. I was sure of the love and mercy of God and didn’t understand why people found this thing called Christianity difficult.

Clearly, God was on my side! I had won in that I made it and everything was going to be fine. I was independent and life looked like it was going to be good after all.  How hasty I was.  As quickly as the business bloomed, it dried up and within 6 months, I was completely penniless with no respite in sight.  Talk about being flummoxed!  Why would God deliver me from a deadly situation only to isolate and starve me.  And the questions, doubts, panic attacks, uncertainties began.

Would that someone had told me that this was the start of my field trip through the wilderness. That which I asked God to deliver me from was both external and internal. The external had been easily taken care of. The internal is the bedrock of these writings.  God had thrown me in a wilderness such as I could not possibly have imagined. Mind you, I have had pain and near death experiences in my life, but nothing like this. As a matter of fact, I had experienced that which psychologists describe as the most painful experience a person could have, i.e. the loss of a child and in my case, only child.

This journey through the wilderness has nothing with which one can compare it. We judge the children of Israel for building a golden calf to worship but going through less than a hundredth of what they faced, we build several calves to worship and we blaspheme God!  

John the Baptist told the Jews that one was coming after him who would baptize them with the Holy Spirit and with fire (Matthew 3:11). Isn’t it interesting that we somehow conveniently overlook the fire part of that declaration? And we begin to scream like banshees at the first and slightest hint of heat, flailing our arms and crying “woe is me!” We either forget or disregard all the injunctions scattered through the Bible about rejoicing in tribulation or counting it all joy when we fall into divers temptations.

 We confess that we have been buried and therefore resurrected with Jesus to share in His glory. In reality, we only want the glory but no part of the burial, we are ready for nothing in us to die. We aren’t even aware that anything in us needs to die. Yes, this is mostly due to faulty teaching, and only enhances the stretching we experience when God decides to take us up on our offer to be used of Him. We all read about winepresses in the Bible but we need to take a moment and consider what a winepress is and how it functions.

i now understand that the taking me out of the unfavorable situation was like plucking the grape from the tree, pretty easy task, isn't it? But then comes the pressing to get the wine out! it is neither easy for the one pressing, nor for the grapes, and while the smashing is going on, it all looks like a mess and a waste of grapes. I remember an episode of "I Love Lucy" in which she found herself in a large tub stomping on grapes! They had grapes and juice flying everywhere, stompers getting all splattered and stained with juice. it was no pretty sight at all,  but, oh! When the wine is made, how sweet it is to the palate, how beautiful it is in the wineskin/bottle.

The grape had to be smashed because the flesh had to be all broken and removed for the juices to flow out. Likewise we have to be broken and smashed depending on how tough our shell is, to get the juices of the Holy Spirit flowing through, and out of us. Moses had a 40 year pressing experience and when he was ready, he felt he was least ready. Everything self had been beaten out of him. The same man who in Egypt had been royalty, very highly education and eloquent, was now so humble and quiet of spirit. He told the Lord upon being given the assignment that he could not speak! But see, now the graces of God could begin flowing out through him.

We’ll continue with my journey tomorrow should the Lord tarry.

Prayer

Heavenly Father, have your way in me, but please strengthen me to be still while you purify and make me ready for your use, in Jesus’ name, Amen.

#momomily2013